Did you hear about the look-a-like competition in China ?
Everybody won.
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What's the ideal weight for a mother-in-law?
About 2.3 pounds including the urn.
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Was so depressed last night that I rang the Samaritans.
Got through to a call centre in Pakistan ..
Told them I was suicidal, they got all excited and asked if I could fly a plane......
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A black man takes a girl home from a nightclub. She says 'Show me it's true what they say about black men'... So he stabbed her and nicked her purse.
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I parked in a disabled space today and a traffic warden shouted to me...
'Oi, what's your disability?'
I said 'Tourettes! Now fuck off!'
General Brother Admiral
Australian SWAT Team
Bravo Base, Australia
Subject: Dont Get Offended 
Wed Jun 03, 2009 2:00 am